


We Might Be Dead By Tomorrow

by thechemicalgirl



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Adult Losers Club (IT), Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Childhood Trauma, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Late Night Conversations, Love Confessions, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-07-12 02:15:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19938475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thechemicalgirl/pseuds/thechemicalgirl
Summary: ''I've forgotten that you even exist for almost twenty seven years, but now it feels like we were never away,' Eddie whispered, tears welling up in his eyes again. 'Are you scared, Rich? Because I am, all the time. Fucking terrified.'They sat in silence for a minute, before Richie quietly said:'Of course I am.''aka the night before the final battle against Pennywise.





	We Might Be Dead By Tomorrow

**Author's Note:**

> Quick note before you start reading, the title comes from a song 'We Might Be Dead By Tomorrow' by SOKO, which I recommend listening to because it fits adult Reddie absolutely perfectly. Stan is not in this fanfiction, but it also doesn't say that he is dead, so let's just keep it that way and pretend he is somewhere, happy and healthy. 
> 
> Have fun reading, and I hope it distracts you from the trailer for a bit because... well.

"Now, Eds," Richie grinned at him brightly, definitely tipsy after drinking three glasses of beer. All of them were at least a bit drunk to be honest - somehow everyone had the same idea of bringing alcohol to their reunion meeting, so after an hour the atmosphere got way more relaxed. "Tell us something about your love life, you have been really quiet."

Eddie looked down at his hands. He could clearly see the pale rim around one of his fingers, right where his wedding band had been a few hours ago. He wasn't even sure why he had taken it off in the first place, but suddenly it felt like a great decision; he didn't have to explain anything to Richie or any of the other Losers, who would surely be curious about his wife if he kept it on. His eyebrows furrowed unconsciously at the thought of it, but he tried to smile at Richie when the taller man nudged his shoulder, still waiting for a response. 

"Hey, what is it? Trouble in paradise? Was lucky Ms Kaspbrak upset that you came here to see us?"

"Richie, let it go," Beverly muttered from the other side of the table, but there was a gentle smile on her face. In the dim lights of a small Chinese restaurant it was almost like a normal meeting among friends, the evil clown and dirty sewers temporarily forgotten. Eddie shook his head slightly.

"No, it's alright. I am married, my wife's name is Myra and in a month it's going to be our second anniversary."

A cheeky expression on Richie's face turned into something more distant for a few seconds, but his usual grin quickly returned. No one else seemed to notice, but Eddie vaguely remembered that he used to make the same face as a kid, whenever he was sad and didn't want them to be concerned. Just a thin crack in the happy facade, when he couldn't hide behind his humor fast enough. What was it now though? Exhaustion? Annoyance? The next thing that came to his mind made Eddie shudder, but he couldn't help wondering: Jealousy? 

"I knew that my Spaghetti Man would be a true tough guy one day," Richie exclaimed, reaching over to pat his back. "Unlike me, unfortunately."

Both Mike and Bill gasped in exaggerated shock, which caused everyone around the table to burst out laughing. 

"Are you telling me no one appreciates your brilliant sense of humor enough to spend all their life with you? Impossible," Beverly teased in a perfectly innocent tone. "I expected you to be after two divorces, at least."

"What can I say, it's hard to meet someone with a good taste these days," Richie shrugged, casually draping his long arm over the back of Eddie's chair and making the other man shift nervously.

They talked for another hour, mostly about their childhood memories which kept coming back to them almost too fast to process. Mike was the only one who remembered everything, including their fight against Pennywise, probably because he had never moved out of Derry. He told them about it with the most details he could describe, and by the end of it they were all feeling a lot more sober, Ben and Eddie's faces white as a sheet. 

"I remember that time when I saved Stan, we both saw It very clearly," Eddie said in a shaky voice, standing up. "I'm really tired, I think I am going to head back to the hotel."

Bill stood up as well, nodding. 

"A-alright, but aren't we all s-s-staying in the same p-place?"

"I mean, there is only one decent hotel in this shithole," Richie laughed dryly, trying to put his coat on. "We could as well all go together. I have a car, five people will definitely fit. Mike?"

"It's fine, I have to go back to the library anyway and my car is at the parking lot. Just... Be careful guys."

"You too man," they muttered in unison. Ben moved to hug Mike, and all of the Losers quickly followed, forming a circle with their arms around each other. The fear that started to find it's way into their minds was more evident with every minute, but the fact that they could stick together made it somehow better. 

"Ready for a wild ride with the boss?" Richie spoke, stepping back first. Bill snorted, rolling his eyes.

"T-try not to kill us b-before that fucking c-c-clown does."

***

It was around midnight when they finally reached the shabby hotel and parted to go to their rooms. Bill and Beverly's rooms were on the same floor, but the rest of them stayed on different ones - Eddie was at the fourth, the top one, so he took the elevator after telling everyone goodnight, not wanting to risk any asthma attacks that late. 

His room was tiny and the air in it felt weirdly heavy, but it had a balcony, so he decided to sit outside for a while instead of suffocating in bed. It was dark, almost no stars visible, only the moon throwing some cold light at the surroundings. Eddie stared at the sky, tears gathering in his eyes despite his attempts to stay calm. Seeing his childhood friends after all those lonely years was incredible, but also a shock - Beverly, Mike and Richie hadn't changed too drastically, but then he probably wouldn't even recognise Ben on the street, he seemed like a completely different person. He wondered what they thought when they saw him; he knew he looked very tired, maybe sick, but it was this way since he was a kid, so it shouldn't come as a surprise. Did he look scared? None of the Losers did, but maybe they tried to hide it. He was terrified to the point where he couldn't breathe properly or stop his hands from shaking, but it didn't seem like any of them were as emotional as him.

He heard a sharp knocking from inside his room and got up to check who it was, legs barely able to keep him upright. 

"Eds!" a low mutter came from the other side of the door. "It's me, could you..."

Richie paused when the door suddenly opened, leaving him face to face with a very distressed Eddie. The shorter man's skin was ghostly pale, dark hair tousled and the shadows under his wide eyes more prominent than ever. He looked stunning like this, standing in the dark, but after a few seconds of staring at Richie he hung his head down so the other man couldn't see his face anymore. 

"I thought that I should check if you are okay, you left really quickly and..."

"Close the door," Eddie interrupted, stepping back and moving to sit down on his bed. "Sorry you waited that long, I was out on a balcony and didn't hear anything."

Richie chewed on his bottom lip and sat down next to him, so close that their arms and thighs were pressed together. 

"Are you okay then?" he asked timidly, causing Eddie to smile despite how awful he felt. He reached over without thinking, and took Richie's cold hand in his much smaller one. The taller man seemed surprised, but quickly enterwined their fingers, squeezing gently.

"I've forgotten that you even exist for almost twenty seven years, but now it feels like we never parted," Eddie whispered, tears welling up in his eyes again. "Are you scared, Rich? Because I am, all the time. Fucking terrified."

They sat in silence for a minute, before Richie quietly said: 

"Of course I am."

"You don't look scared," Eddie admitted, and to his surprise Richie laughed humorlessly, turning to face him. 

"Well, that's the whole point! You act stupid, people laugh and think you are the happiest person in the world. Good to know it works."

Eddie shook his head with a frown and leaned forward to hug him tightly. Richie's curly hair tickled his cheek, but he didn't plan on pulling back any time soon, since they both needed the comfort of each other's touch so obviously.

"Why did you take your wedding ring off?" Richie suddenly muttered, and Eddie tensed unwittingly.

"My marriage isn't exactly great," he finally replied, sighing. "Do you remember my mother?"

"I do now, she hated all of us. Wasn't she always convinced that you were sick or something?"

"Yes... and Myra is just like her."

Richie withdrawed from their embrace a bit, just enough to look him in the eyes. 

"I'm sorry Eds, you deserve someone who would make you happy."

All of a sudden Eddie couldn't take it anymore. The whole evening left him regretting so many things he hadn't done in the past, he couldn't afford hiding anything any longer.  
He put his hand on the back of Richie's neck, causing him to lean forward, and kissed him.  
He moved his lips gingerly at first, expecting Richie to push him away at any moment, but it didn't happen. Instead he felt long fingers running through his hair and urging him closer, until he could barely breathe. The kiss was everything Eddie had ever dared to imagine, unlike anything he'd ever shared with Myra; desparate, impatient and leaving his head spinning when they drew apart.

"Christ Eds," Richie breathed, and then pecked him on the lips once more. "We wasted so much time."

Eddie nodded, the tears that kept gathering in his eyes finally escaping. He cursed this awful town for making him forget the only person he had ever loved, the person who could have made his life so much better. All those years he was incredibly lonely, and that one evening was enough to make him wish he could turn the time back. 

"Hey," Richie whispered, cupping his face and trying to wipe the tears away. "Don't cry, we are going to kill this thing once and for all and then we will never come back."

"What if it kills us instead?"

"Well, if we are going to die tomorrow, then at least I have one day to love you properly," he answered, voice low and a bit choked. "Could you try to sleep?"

Eddie nodded and lied down, looking up at him expectantly. Richie joined him without hesitation, wrapping his arms around the smaller man and pressing his mouth to his wet cheek.

"Rich?"

"What?"

"If we survive, don't let me forget you again."

Richie kissed him in a way that could only mean he would never. 

***

Eddie suddenly woke up at around five in the morning, Richie nowhere to be seen. He felt panic raising in his chest, but then he saw an outline of a person standing on a blacony and breathed out in relief, getting out of bed to join him. 

"Why are you out there all alone?" he muttered sleepily, coming behind the taller man and pressing his cheek against his back. It was really cold for late August and Eddie shuddered, making Richie laugh. 

"Well, I called your mum to ask her if she wants to come along, but she didn't pick up."

"I can't believe you are still telling this horrible jokes after all those years!"

"Me neither, I think it's something about this place," Richie said thoughtfully. "I feel like a kid again."

They watched the sun beggining to rise in silence, breathing in synch. Eddie pressed a kiss to Richie's shoulder blade before whispering: 

"Look how beautiful everything is, right? I used to sit on my windowsill as a kid and watch the sunset or the stars sometimes, when I felt like I needed to calm down. And now we are here, together, and it's the same feeling," he paused, closing his eyes. "But this time I know that a moment like this might never happen again. We both might die tomorrow and I will never watch the sunrise again, so just... this one seems like the most beautiful one. I am so happy I can share this with you, Rich."

Richie was quiet for a minute, but then he abruptly spun around and kissed him, lips chapped and gentle. Eddie immediately responded, opening his mouth and putting his cold hand on Richie's cheek. They stayed like that for a long time, heated kisses eventually turning into a simple soft press of lips, reasurring and full of affection.

"I really hope we make it out of here so I can annoy you for the rest of my life," Richie said, his eyes slightly teary when he looked down at Eddie. "I love you, I wish I told you this twenty seven years ago."

Eddie smiled sadly. 

"I love you too, Rich. We survive today, and then we have all the time in the world, okay?"

Richie nodded, and then they both turned to watch the sunrise again, feeling like it could be the most special sunrise the had ever witnessed. Whatever waited for them in the sewers, they were going to face it, finally together for the first time in twenty seven years.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, back to my author bullshit. If you enjoyed my work, leave something behind, I especially love and appreciate comments so if you want to say something nice or talk about the trailer that left us all in tears, don't be shy! You can also message me on my tumblr @thechemicalgirl, I post about books and TV shows, including IT. 
> 
> There isn't enough adult Reddie fics out there in my opinion, so I did what they say: you want something that isn't there, create it yourself. This is the first time that I basically made myself cry with my own work, and I apologize if you got a bit too emotional reading it as well. Gotta love waiting for the movie where all the shit is about to go down! 
> 
> Thanks for reading,  
> Alexa


End file.
